Friday, January 18, 2013

Dealing With Bullying

At some point in our lives, almost everyone gets bullied in some way. It may have been mild teasing in elementary school, and only lasted for a short period of time. Or it's that mean girl or guy that picks on you and your friends for seemingly silly things. Maybe it doesn't bother you that much, and what they say doesn't really get to you. But for some, the bullying can be much worse, and can even get physical. And modern technology can make it even harder to get away from it. Victims can often feel trapped, and like they are alone. Sometimes it can lead to the victim suffering from depression or other emotional problems. I have personally been badly bullied in the past, but I'll tell that story another day.

We've all heard the saying, "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me." I disagree with this statement. If you break a bone, or get a bruise, it will eventually heal. You may even eventually by able to get a good laugh off of it. Physical pain passes, words and memories stick. When you are taunted, or picked on daily, it's often easy to start believing what people say, and start thinking something is wrong with you. Words can ruin your reputation, and destroy your self-esteem. There is no reason that you should need to deal with the taunting and false rumors about you, you are better then that.

So what can you do? First of all, DON'T fight back by calling then a name or saying something about them. They want you to stoop to their level, they want to see you get angry or upset. And NEVER hit someone unless they hit you, you'll get in more trouble if you start a fight. If they hit you, you have every right to defend yourself, but something should be done before it escalates to the point of physical violence. I have been told before to just try to ignore it, and don't react,eventually the bully will get bored, but this isn't always the case. They will try anything to get a reaction out of you, and you shouldn't need to sit around and deal with it and let it get worse. The best thing you can is tell someone, preferably an adult that can help. It can be a teacher, guidance counselor, parent, or any other adult you trust. They can find ways to help you deal with it, and try to put an end to it. **If you are being physically threatened, this is a matter for law enforcement.** NEVER be ashamed to ask for help, it may not be easy... but things will get better.

Remember, there are always people who care about you, and that will support you. Your friends and family care about you and want the best for you. You have so much going for you, and there is most definitely something good about you. I have a challenge on my blog to find at least 5 things you like about yourself, try it out. Don't let other people bring you down. Bullies try to bring others down to boost their own ego. Never let anyone make you feel like less than what you are. 

This song has really helped me a lot. I love BOTDF (I have a different taste in music, and I'm not ashamed of it =]) and the message behind this song, and even if you don't like Blood On The Dance Floor, the message is still great. 

Remember, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! There are others going through the same things, and people that care about you, people who will be willing to help you and talk with you. If you just need someone to talk to, you can always talk to a close friend, sibling, as well as an adult. There are also multiple hotlines you can call to talk with someone. If you are having thoughts of suicide, or self-harm, it's best to seek professional help. Don't give up, things will get better.

You are all so amazing, and there are so many great things about you. For those of you who need to deal with bullying on a regular basis, I know how you feel, and I know it's never easy. Just keep working towards your dreams, you may even become that bully's boss one day. And for those of you who have never had to deal with harsh bullying, you are very fortunate, and I'm happy for you. I care for all of you, even if I don't know you. :)

*Disclaimer: I am in no way an expert or a professional. I am sharing what I have learned from experience, as well as what I have learned in the past. 

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